Salesmen have all the rules and customers have none. Well at
least not on record. Here I pen my secret wish list of an ideal customer I am
yet to meet- in the form of a virtual letter. :)
Dear Customer,
Thank you for giving me the opportunity to meet up with you.
Even as I write this letter to you in anticipation for a favorable outcome; I
have a few points to make which could make our transaction easier.
I am a well-oiled selling machine with a smile so charming I
should have sold tooth paste instead. Call it your bad luck, I have been taught,
trained and hammered with techniques which will ensure your order comes to me.
And I have a long mental checklist of what to do and what not to. Hence, as a professional,
I too have some expectations from you -as
a customer. Why is that I have rules and you have none! If you are the
king, well it’s me who has to make you feel so. Anyways to earn the King title
I request you behave like one. Win my heart and I will do anything to get you
the best deal and service thereafter.
My submissions for you to be a Good Customer are:
1.Please honor
the time of appointment- Yours and my time are precious and please don’t feel
amused to see me sit outside your cabin reading those outdated magazines.
2. You have
a Need and I have the Solution- Please treat me as a solution provider.
Your need is well analyzed and my product should do the work. Else be specific on
what you need. I am not here to be a Sherlock Holmes.
3. Let me
Talk- My sales pitch is different. Listen to what I say. Let me explain the value proposition. There are
numerous products out there in the market. Let me explain the value I can
deliver.
4.You have
Googled- Google has made everyone intelligent. You have a list of negative
remarks on my product. Please note throwing negative remarks will not make me
succumb. Please read all those positive reviews too. That should help you
understand the product better.
5. You Behave To Be Price Sensitive- How
come budgets are cut only when it comes to negotiations. Please share with me
your budget; I will pitch in the right product which will not burn your
pockets.
6.Veiled Threat to Speak to my Manager- Please
don’t use that on me. It will not help. I am empowered to give you the best
deal. Talking to managers usually end up in me deciding what is right for you
and the company I represent.
7.Aggression is the short cut for a price
cut- Well no. Aggression will lead you to incur higher medical bills but no
price reduction from me. I will ensure to keep you calm, but if aggression is a
tactic, I am out of the game. Reading
point 5 once again will help.
8.Read Points 1-7 once again- Last but
not the least, please read the 7 points. You will love following what I have
said. You will not only get the right product at the right price but also a
friend for life who will go to any extent to support you, at any cost.
Yours Truly,
The
Salesman
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